There is a line in the book The Kite Runner; “Perhaps ultimate redemption is when we turn guilt into good.”

As an addict and a mother, my sense of guilt is huge. My many attempts to help others may be in part an attempt to assuage some of that guilt. But will I ever repay my debt to my children?

I can barely imagine putting into words or print my many transgressions with my kids. Some are unspeakable in my mind.

To make a verbal amends to them at this point in time in their tender years would be inappropriate. So what is a mother to do?

Turn guilt into good.

But when will I ever be done? Will I ever forgive myself? That might very well be the final frontier in my life. We can hope.